03-09-2015 Failure to Launch

Dear Joseph,

My plans to launch a rocket before your birthday got scrubbed due to bad weather.  Instead, I spent the weekend at home cleaning the pool. This winter has been a tough one and the pool turned green. Michèle bought a bunch of plants we plan to put into the garden. I’m especially excited about the dill plant.  You guys weren’t born the first time I planted dill. I used it on everything. I surrounded a patch of watermelons with it and they grew wonderfully.

So now I’m not sure what I have planned to celebrate your birthday. I thought about taking Wednesday off and going to the zoo. Or maybe have a marathon day at the movies.  Most likely, I’ll just come into work and bury myself in code. Not only is it your 16th birthday, but it will be the 9th year I haven’t seen or talked to you and your sister. I hope you miss me as much as I miss you.

I sure hope that you are curious about life. I hope that you will want to know the real answers about what happened between your mother and me.  Just know that even if I don’t love your mother doesn’t mean I don’t love you and Lucia. I love the two of you so much and I miss you both horribly.

So rest assured as you are coming of age, I’ll be here waiting.  Waiting for you to reach out one day.


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