Markus Randel's Blog

Dear Joseph and Lucia,

It’s another Monday back at work. I still haven’t heard any news about my car getting fixed.  I’m a little anxious about that, but what can I do? Not much.  So I’ll just keep plugging away.

The drive back to OKC last night was difficult.  The weather was wet and cold. The little rental I’m driving handled it ok, but I’m still not familiar with it and I was nervous the whole time.  I pulled in around 7:30 PM and was in bed within an hour.

The weather is only going to get worse over the next few days. I’m not looking forward to icy roads, but again what can I do about it?  Not much, so I just need to bundle up and prepare for the worst.

Well, I have another test cell to experiment with and should get to it.  Just wanted to let you know, I’m thinking about you guys as always.  Until you can reach out, I’ll be waiting.

Love,
Dad

Dear Joseph and Lucia,

(I’m giving away more information than I likely should, but if you’re reading this Margaret, please don’t just stand by any more. The children deserve better!)

I’ve found a way to see who is reading these letters.  I don’t mean to control, but I am so desperate to know if you are reading them. I won’t say what I’ve found, but I doubt either of you are reading them.  That makes me sad.  I know Gabriel in Brazil is reading them.  So are your Grandmother in Brussels and many other relatives all over.  Even one of your cousins in New Iberia reads them daily.  I suspect that your mother is in touch with them and they are keeping her up to date.

But, sadly, my intended audience isn’t reached.  Please search for your names.  Find me. I have so much to share with you.  Every day I’m out of your lives is a sad moment.  There’s just no explaining how sad it makes me.  I’m doing everything I can to continue on with my life and not collapse into despair.

There. I’ve gotten that off my chest.  Time to dust off and live another day. I’ll be strong so you will have a father when you seek me out. Please be brave. Ask questions. Rebel against what you’ve been told.  Scream at me. Cry to me.  Do anything… just don’t stay silent. I have answers your mother won’t give you.

I know, Joseph, you have grown tall and your hair is darkening.  I’m glad you still play trumpet.  Lucia, your hair is still blonde.  I would love to see a full picture of both of you to see what handsome kids you have grown into. But, I’ll wait. As always.

Love,
Dad

Dear Joseph and Lucia,

My car decided to stop working yesterday just as I was leaving work. I’m very lucky to have friends at work that were able to take me to a car rental.  So I’m trying to see about getting the car into a shop and figuring out my plans for the weekend.

But in the end, this is just a small problem. Part of me is freaking out, but I know it’s just a material item. The things that really matter are you two, Michèle, and the girls.  Perspective!

Time to get back to work.  Never be afraid to reach out to me. I’ll be waiting.

Love,
Dad

Dear Joseph and Lucia,

There are three people you have never met that are very important to me. Two of which you will never meet. Momma Mickey and Papa Gene have both passed away. I carry their memories with me constantly. The third is your Uncle Martin, my brother. We haven’t always gotten along real well, but he is my brother and I love him.  It’s only fair that as the last remaining member of my birth family, you should get to know him.

Just like us, he had a first marriage with a boy and a girl.  The marriage ended, but he still has a strong influence and relationship with his children. Also, like me, he remarried to a very compassionate and kind woman that helps him keep it together.

These are the people I grew up with and called my family until I met your mother and made our family. Despite all our differences, I still cherish my memories of the times we had together. My experiences with these three people are gold to me.

Love,
Dad

Dear Joseph and Lucia,

I’m patiently waiting for access to one of the test cells.  We have 7.  Each one is equipped with the ability to completely control all environmental conditions and test an AC unit inside.  What I’m doing is writing the control software that runs all the tests necessary to approve a design for the standards required.  Basically, it runs real big AC units to test a smaller AC unit.

Sadly, there is a long line of units in the queue for testing, so whenever I come up with a new program, I have to wait for an opening in the testing schedule. It gets a bit frustrating at times.  But, it gives me ample time to review my software for possible bugs. Just while typing this out, I realized another possible error I need to check for.

I’ve made a couple mistakes that were pretty cool.  My first was I didn’t reset the control loop on the voltage control and blew up a control board (lightning).  My next time, I accidentally left the heat and humidity on for too long.  When I opened the door, the cold air hit it and it instantly rained inside the cell.  Another time, the humidity was off in a cold cell and I created a huge fog bank.  I’ve also created clouds inside the room under different conditions.

So that is what your old man does for a living these days.  I create lightning, rain, fog and clouds.  I’m looking forward to creating snow one day.

Until I see you guys again, I’ll be waiting.

Love,
Dad

Dear Joseph and Lucia,

I don’t have much on my mind this morning. Work is a little slow again so I thought I’d just pop on and say good morning to you guys.

I have more pictures of Hiram I’d like to upload and share, but they are on my home computer.  I’ll try to remember to post them tonight.

The job is going well.  The new rented room is nice. It seems everything is going ok.  I worry about Michèle (as she worries about me).  And you two are always on my mind.

I’ve been learning more about Parental Alienation.  What I’m learning doesn’t look positive, but I have to keep hope that one day one of you will reach out to me for answers.  Until then, I’ll wait and keep writing letters to you.

Love,
Dad

Dear Joseph and Lucia,

The new house I’m living in is nice.  It’s a big house in a nice neighborhood. There’s a pool and Jacuzzi, but they are both closed for winter.  There’s cable and wifi, which is a large improvement over the last place. The owner is a bit of a hippie, but he’s really friendly.

Work is slow today. It seems like everyone is having a hard time getting back into the swing of things. I spent a good while just going through my emails.  I’ve been lazy and haven’t checked any of my accounts for the last 2 weeks. Needless to say there were 100’s of them. Most of it was trash, but I’m always keeping an eye out for anything from you two.

Well, I need to get back to work. I’ll keep waiting.

Love,
Dad